@campsucks: I’m not sure if I need to know who retweeted my retweet.
@porters: We all tried, and it’s not working. Let’s just stick with “Sent from my iPhone,” everybody.
@AaronFullerton: The phrase “showstopping performance” is always a lie.
@trevso_electric: Find someone who loves your weirdness.
@juliussharpe: I just gave my kid ice cream because she wouldn’t stop crying. Sorry, whoever she winds up marrying.
@TheBiggIdea: Best ways to show you know celebs:
1. Plug book using “my friend”
2. @ reply them an inside joke
3. Post pic w them saying “Normal Thurs”
@dance_blessed: “Michael Kors.”
@sofifii: I think we need to demand as a culture 5 emails max regarding the same subject anything over you get murdered anything under you get candy
@BlitznBeans: Hi @MittRomney you still have those binders?
@trevso_electric: It was Paula Deen! I used to read WordUp magazine